Tag Archives: dating

Pick-up Lines: The (Not so) Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

30 Oct

Since moving to Botswana, I have met some really great people. I have also met a lot really seedy men with even seedier lines. Here are some of the lines I have gotten so far:
“I want to be your special friend… do you know what I mean, special friend?”
“Hey white girl! I want to come visit you at your house.”
“Come to my home in Harare and I will teach you how to swim.” (this one is particularly great when you know that I have competed both provincially and nationally at lifeguarding)
This one from a middle-aged woman: “You are how old? 21? My youngest son is 24 and he still needs a wife. How many cows do your parents want?”
This one from a drunken man, who is mumbling in broken English and can barely stand straight: “I sit beside you? I just want to know you.”
“I have (insert number here) cows. How many cows do your parents want?”
“Buy me a drink?”
“The best way to learn Setswana is from the pillow.”
“If you kiss a Motswana, then you will know how to speak Setswana.”
“I am looking for a mother to my son – maybe it will be you.” (My response to this: “How old is your son?” “14” “And you are how old?” “35” “Your son is closer to my age than you are.” “Oh…”)
“Actions speak louder than words and I have tried to show you that I want to be your friend. And your lover.”
I had became really close friends to a Motswana boy in Kang, and when he left early, other men took it as an opportunity to hit on me. These are some lines I got: “Can I take care you the way he did?” “He blew his chance to date a white girl! If it was me, I would marry you,” “He’s not coming back. But I can make you come. Do you know what I mean, come?” (Yeah, class act that last one. I played dumb.)
Well there you have it! My fellow indevours and expat friends – what lines have you all gotten so far?

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